18 Secrets your dog won't tell you

Let's listen your dog. Here're 18 doggy secrets you should know.

#1. I’m not just taking my time.

There is a reason why dogs spin around before going to the bathroom and it has nothing to do with endeavouring to make you late for work. A study published in the journal Frontiers in Zoology found that dogs poop in alignment with Earth’s magnetic field. After observing 70 dogs—made up of 37 breeds-over two years, a clear preference for an alignment with the north-south axis was documented, with the east-west avoided. Just why they instinctually prefer this positioning for defecation and how exactly they perceive the magnetic field is still unclear, but at least we know what all that spinning around is about. So patience, please. Genius at work.

#2. Give me a purpose, and I’ll be happy.

People enjoy doing work they love and getting well paid for it. Why wouldn’t dogs? People also love doing work that encourages them to learn. Dogs are no different. Better yet, turn work into play, and tails will be wagging! I’d rather work for a living than lie around all day with nothing to do. 

#3. Different dogs prefer different types of beds

When choosing a bed for me, please pay attention to how I sleep. If I like to curl up, I’d probably love a bumper bed, but if I usually sleep with my legs sticking straight out, I’d prefer a flat bed without sides or bolsters. Also, many dogs also like to have a blanket to cover themselves up with. Just sayin’.

#4. Just because I’m wagging my tail…

…doesn’t mean I’m friendly or in a good mood. We dogs also sometimes wag our tails when we’re agitated, annoyed or angry. Pay attention to my tail's positioning. A loose, hip-swaying, wiggly, side-to-side wag usually means I’m happy to see you, whereas a tail held high and stiff that’s rigidly wagging means I am in a state of high excitement or agitation. Also look for tense muscles, particularly in the face, dilated pupils and pinned ears-these are not signs of a relaxed dog.

#5. I'd like to be challenged

We dogs are smart and we like games that make us think. We would appreciate you hiding cookies around the house for us to find, giving us smart toys to play with, and taking us to new places so we have novel environs to explore.

#6. Please, please don’t overfeed me

The latest study by the Association for Pet Obesity Prevention found that 53 percent of U.S. dogs were overweight or obese. All that extra weight leads to an increased risk of arthritis, heart disease, and cancer, among other ailments, so please don’t free feed us. We won’t monitor our own intake so give us an appropriately sized high quality breakfast and dinner. When choosing a dog food, look for whole meats in the ingredients list-lamb, beef, turkey, chicken-as opposed to, say, turkey meal. Whole grains are better than by-products and foods preserved with vitmanin E and vitamin C, sometimes labeled as mixed tocopherols, are much preferable to those with chemical preservatives. And dogs definitely don’t need artificial colours or flavours-those are there to appeal to you!

#7 Access to the backyard does not replace a walk

Dogs are pack animals and like to be with their people. If left outside, we’re most likely just sitting and waiting for you to return and let us back indoors where we can be part of the action.

#8. I’m not just being bad…

I’m bored! Studies have found dogs, on average, posses the intellect of a human two-year-old, and we can all imagine how much trouble a toddler left to their own devices all day could get up to (read: disaster). So if I’m barking, jumping or wrecking things, chances are I need a lot more exercise and attention. Please unplug and take me to the dog park or spend a minute brushing up on my trick repertoire (cookies a welcome addition).

#9. If you’re a stranger…

So let me approach you. If you crouch down a short distance from me and glance off to the side, I will be much happier and more relaxed approaching on my own terms than if you reach your hand down into my face, an action that may make me nervous or might appear threatening.

#10. I am a creature of habit and I like consistency…

…particularly where training is concerned. If you let me up on the couch sometimes, I will not understand that I cannot be up there all the time. If my habits suddenly and drastically change, please take me to the vet; a sudden change in behaviour is often indicative of an underlying medical issue.

#11. I don’t like to be hugged. Why are you always putting your arms around me?

In human behavior, a hug is a sign of affection. I know it can be tempting to say, “I love you” to your dog with a hug. But, that’s not what it means to him. In dogs it represents social status and they can easily feel like they are being restrained. It’s an invasion of their space. Some dogs can tolerate hugs, but many can’t.

#12. I don’t much care to be pet on my head either. Please don’t let strangers approach and pet my head.

Again, some dogs can tolerate this, but many can’t. A hand reaching over a dog’s head can feel very threatening from a stranger. Instead, reach under a dog to rub his chest. If it’s a dog you’ve never met, always ask for permission first and let him come to you to sniff you first. 

#13. Humans have created a crazy sound environment that I often find stressful. Please know that I hear sounds more than twice as high as you. I’m always trying to orient every sound to know if it’s safe or not.

Humans hear sounds between 20-20,000 Hz. Dogs hear at least twice as high, sometimes all the way up to 55,000 Hz. While I think it’s great that more events and public places are dog friendly, so often those environments are created for humans. A fundraising party for dogs and their people that benefits your local shelter, doesn’t benefit your dog when a loud band is playing. Please be careful what sounds you subject your dog to, and provide simple sounds at home that calm the canine nervous system.

#14. Don’t correct me for growling. It could be my way of telling you that I feel threatened.

Dogs communicate with their growls. If it’s a play growl, think of it as your dog laughing. But, if it’s a growl that is communicating stress — showing teeth, fur raised, body tense — then it’s his way of saying, “I’m not comfortable right now. I’m feeling scared and threatened.” While you don’t want to ignore their growl, correcting it or scolding him for growling will only increase his fear. It’s a way of telling him not to express his fear and there is something to be afraid of. Next time, he may skip the growl and just bite.

#15. It’s very confusing to me when you ask me to do something that I’m rewarded for one time and scolded for the same behavior another time.

You come home from work and your dog is so excited to see you. He jumps up on you and gets praise and attention. The next day, your neighbor knocks on the door, and your dog gets so excited and jumps on them and you yell at him. This can be very confusing to a dog.

#16. I may be old but I still need companionship and age-appropriate exercise

Yes, I sleep more (please move my bed somewhere that I have my space but am still part of things) but that doesn’t mean I shouldn’t be roused for an after dinner stroll. I can also learn new tricks. That old adage about old dogs? Patently untrue. Modern Dog’s Creative Director taught her ten-year-old Dachshund, Esther, to sneeze on command. It took a few minutes over a few days and is now Esther’s favourite party trick. (It’s all about capturing and rewarding the behaviour—every time your dog happens to sneeze, say “good sneeze” and give her a treat.)

#17. I’m older now, and my nervous system is more sensitive than when I was in my younger years.

Like people, dog’s nervous systems are more sensitive as they mature. The same things that used to be interesting to them may now be annoying and stressful. Maybe they could handle loud, crowded environments as a youngster but in their senior years, they might prefer to stay home and watch the grass grow. 

#18. Even if you never listen to all of my secrets, I’ll still love you anyhow.